Tuesday, 16 September 2014

Movie Moments

There’s that moment in every chick-flick, or teen movie, or any story where the protagonist is being put down and made to feel like crap.

You already know what I’m talking about, don’t you? That moment sticks in our minds. It’s delicious:

“Yeah. Yeah I am [a freak]. But you know what? Someday I might just grow out of that. But you, you will never stop being a jerk.”   --Princess Diaries

“You’re just some bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mom’s wedding dress.” –27 Dresses

You turned out to be exactly who I thought you were. I never pretended to be somebody else. It's been me all along. And it was me who was hurt in front of everybody. Look, I didn't come here to yell at you, okay? I came to tell you that I know what it feels like to be afraid to show who you are. I was, but I'm not anymore. And the thing is, I really don't care what people think about me... because I believe in myself. And I know that things are gonna be okay. But even though I have no family, and no job, and no money for college... it's you that I feel sorry for.” –A Cinderella Story

“If I'm going to be a partner in a law firm by the time I'm 30, I need a boyfriend who's not such a complete bonehead.” –Legally Blonde  

“I'm about three years late in telling you this, but nevertheless I need to say it. Jasper. Wait, I need the lights on. Jasper, you have never treated me right. Ever. Shush. You broke my heart. And you acted like somehow it was my fault, my misunderstanding, and I was too in love with you to ever be mad at you, so I just punished myself! For years! But you waltzing in here on my lovely Christmas holiday, and telling me that you don't want to lose me whilst you're about to get MARRIED, somehow newly entitles me to say, it's over. This - This twisted, toxic THING between us, is finally finished! I'm miraculously done being in love with you! Ha! I've got a life to start living. And you're not going to be in it.” –The Holiday

For many years I have both wanted and not wanted one of these moments. I think it’s true for many of us—admit it—to say that we have a few of these planned out. A few monologues written down in our own heads that we’d say to someone if we ever had the… well, gumption.

It becomes totally clear in your head just what you will say, just how you will march up to the school bully, the intimidating teacher, the guy or girl who supposedly broke your heart… You’ve perfected your speech and you fantasise, though perhaps never with full intention, about throwing a drink over them or slapping them in the face.

I tend to avoid people who upset me. In a way, I want that moment, of course I do. I want closure. But it’s never going to happen: that’s not the kind of person I am. I’ve actually had a few opportunities for my “moment” that I’ve missed, half on purpose and half due to lack of bottle. But then again, perhaps the people that “grind my gears” (new favourite phrase) would simply love to see me lose it and scream and shout at them. Maybe it’s what they’d want and I’m better off not giving it to them.

The truth is, most of us will never get our movie moments… and that’s OK. We can get closure in our own minds instead: closure that we are moving on, and we do see things for what they are… without needing to have it all out in public (or just to that one person), as appealing as that may sound at times.

It’s not up to us to expose fake for what it is, or to announce all of someone’s wrongdoings to a crowd—as much as we might like to, what would be the point? It’s likely that the person concerned—and a hell of a lot of other people—know that they’ve acted out of line, and know that you’re hurt. If you won’t stand for it any more, there’s no need to announce that. Just stop standing.

So a lot of my monologues remain unsaid, but they’ll be shown to the world in other ways. When I achieve what people said I never would, when I make new friends and cherish old ones… or even when I simply wake up one morning and realise I’ve gotten over something. Those will be my movie moments.

I don’t really know how to round off this blog post. I guess it’s just something I’ve been thinking about for a while. Have you ever had or wanted to have a movie moment?  Do you think they’re necessary? 


  1. I had a positive movie moment once , one that reminded me of the Perks Of Being A Wallflower. I was at a party with friends, most of whom I'd known for lest than a year. But they made me feel so loved, and just for those few hours, I felt "infinite." It felt like the party scene where everyone toasts Charlie, or the scene in the pickup truck with that infamous line. It's a bit of a bitter sweet memory, as I'm only really talking to two of the people that were actually there that night, but it was amazing while it lasted, and that's all that matters to me now.

    1. I think that's an incredibly mature way of looking at things, and one I'm going to try to adopt: just because things didn't go to plan with your friends, doesn't mean you can't enjoy the memories.

      Thanks so much for the comment, I think that's such a great way to look at life.